The most emotionally intelligent leader I was lucky to work for

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When I returned from London at the end of 1990, the unemployment rate in Australia was 9.8%, and few suitable jobs were available for a below-average 24-year-old recruitment consultant.

In one of the luckiest breaks of my life there was a job available at Temporary Solutions in Sydney.

I started my new job in the third week of January 1991, reporting to Bronwyn (photo right, December 1991), who would be my manager for the next four and a half years.

I was about to enter the most critical stage of my career- If I failed as a recruitment consultant I had no idea what else my modest skills would be useful for.

Fortunately, in Bronwyn, I had an emotionally intelligent leader who knew how to get the best out of me.

According to psychologist and author, Daniel Goleman, “..the more emotionally demanding the work, the more empathic and supportive the leader needs to be. Empathetic people are superb at recognising and meeting the needs of clients, customers or subordinates.”

Working as a recruiter in the middle of the early 1990s recession in Sydney was very emotionally demanding – jobs were hard to come by, and we had many out-of-work candidates who were desperate to work. Business development calls and visits consumed a large part of each day.

In that environment, Bronwyn was exactly the leader I needed, the type of leader Goleman identifies as emotionally intelligent.

“Under the guidance of an EI leader, people feel a mutual comfort level. They share ideas, learn from one another, make decisions collaboratively, and get things done. They form an emotional bond that helps them stay focused even amid profound change and uncertainty.

Perhaps most important, connecting with others at an emotional level makes work more meaningful. We all know what it feels like to share in the excitement of a moment, the elation of completing a job well done. These feelings drive people to do things together that no individual could or would do. And it is the EI leader who knows how to bring about that kind of bonding.”

Bronwyn displayed the four domains and associated competencies of emotionally intelligent leaders

Self-awareness (comprising emotional self-awareness, accurate self-assessment, and self-confidence)
Self-management (comprising emotional self-control, transparency, adaptability, achievement drive, initiative and optimism)
Social awareness (comprising empathy, organisational awareness, and service)
Relationship management (comprising inspirational leadership, influence, developing others, change catalyst, conflict management, building bonds, teamwork and collaboration)

As Goleman says “…no leader has strengths across the board in every one of the many EI competencies. Highly effective leaders typically exhibit a critical mass of strength in a half-dozen or so EI competencies.”

Bronwyn’s strengths were many. The ones I particularly appreciated were;

High standards: She set the bar for me and the rest of the team
Worked hard but knew when to lighten up and have fun: Our working day was 8 am – 5.30 pm and we worked hard all day however it was interspersed with lots of fun and laughter.
Took no shit from anybody: Even in a very tough market where margin pressure was constant, Bronwyn stood up for her value as a recruiter and was never subservient to any of the many (mostly older male) hiring managers she dealt with.
Optimistic and positive: The market was tough for a long time, but she was never anything other than upbeat about tomorrow, next week, next month or next quarter. In her presence, it was impossible to feel defeated or negative for more than a few minutes.
Fostering our collaborative team spirit: The temp team we worked together quickly and effectively to fill every vacancy with the best available candidate. We thrived on the thrill of making a great match within minutes of a vacancy being registered. The sense of team was palpable in everything we did.
Cared about me: Growing up as the eldest child with three younger sisters, I now had the wonderful experience of working with two women who were like the older sisters I never had. Bronwyn and Michelle (the senior consultant of the team when I joined, pictured below right at 50 Margaret Street)) took me under their respective wings with their advice about fashion, haircuts, dating, and many other things, helping me navigate life as a young man in a city with no partner and no family.
Honest with me: I pulled from my archives my first performance review (end of 1991) in which Bronwyn identified my weaknesses and areas for development; “Speed reaction to situations – go with your gut feeling. Complete tasks to the best of your ability and move on. Apply more applicant control. Don’t dwell too long on mistakes and problems – move on. Relax and enjoy yourself.” I remember these issues clearly and knew I had to rectify them. I could hear these things because in the same review, Bronwyn also identified my strengths, which I prided myself on; “Enthusiasm, loyalty and dedication to the job. Popular staff member who contributes well to the company morale. Good marketing skills which have generated valuable new clients. Professional approach to your own and colleagues’ development and business knowledge.”

I look back at my 35 years in the recruitment industry and feel nothing but gratitude and appreciation for the experience I had working for Bronwyn, the most emotionally intelligent leader I worked for – the perfect leader for me at that stage of my life.